All That Glitters
by Christian1
Summary: Jeff loses his heart, through the eyes of a child.
1. Chapter 1

"Three whole day's of nothing more then Relaxation" Jeff Hardy exclaimed. Both he and his brother Matt had been touring, on the road, going from this place to that, for close to three month's without a break. If it wasn't a match or working out, it was then some public appearance. Three month's Vince McMahon worked them, straight to the bone. The two were really looking forward to the three day's he finally promised them.

"I know." Matt replied as he and Jeff pulled their luggage from within the car. "Can you believe it, it's finally here."

Jeff grunted a reply, Matt knew what that was about. When Vince told them he could give them three day's top's. Jeff nearly blew his own top, infuriated that after all that hard work, they were only given one day per the three months.

Together they brought in their gear, after unpacking Jeff fell down onto the living room couch, purely exhausted, after a few moment's, Matt to came and plopped down on the chair next to Jeff.

"Now that was a workout." Matt said.

"I didn't even know we had that many clothes!" Jeff proclaimed.

"We don't." Matt said with a grin as Jeff turned toward him, a look of confusion written on his face.  
"You do!"

With that he rustled the younger Hardy's rainbow hair, running from the room, half expecting to have Jeff close behind him. Jeff however stayed on the couch, turning and twisting until he was comfortable enough, he slowly drifted of into a, much needed sleep.

A few hours must have passed, for when Jeff woke up Matt had the living room light's on, and a blanket thrown over top of him.

"Yea, I understand ... but." Matt said from behind him. Jeff turned to see Matt on the phone, his face twisted with anger.

"Who is it?" Jeff mouthed to him.

"Vince." Matt said back, Jeff leaned back onto the couch again he knew what was coming. "There goes my three day's."

"Isn't there anyone else?" Matt said close to pleading into the phone. "All right, all right. I understand, we'll do it."

With a sigh Matt hung up the phone dropping it back down onto the cradle.

"How long do we have?" Jeff asked.

"Well, it's not entirely bad." Matt said. "Vince wants us to do a hospital appearance. Apparently it will just be the kid's that are there, no press or anything. And get this, he said we have to stay at least three hours."

"Damnit!" Jeff replied. "What happened to the three day's, and what's not entirely bad about that?"

"Well, once we do this, we have a month off." Matt said walking around the couch to sit down on the chair again.

"A month?" Jeff repeated sitting up.

"Yea, I couldn't believe it either. This is supposed to be big for them I guess. Probably some charity deal."

"Where's this hospital at?"

"Pittsburgh, it's a Children's hospital." Matt replied.

Jeff slowly gathered himself and began to walk towards his room.

"Where you going?" Matt asked.

"To bed!" Jeff exclaimed and continued to walk.

Matt chuckled, getting up himself to go to bed. Not to sure of what to expect tomorrow, yet had a gut feeling something was going to happen.

The next morning Matt woke up surprised to hear the shower running. With a small smile, he stretched out in his bed.

"Maybe he's not going to take this to bad." He said.

A few moments later he heard the shower turn off, and then Jeff's electric shaver kick on. A groan escaped from within Matt, anytime Jeff groomed himself he always left a mess afterwards, rarely cleaning it up. Another groan escaped Matt's lips as he forced himself out of bed. Trudging down the stairs, Matt forced himself into the kitchen, grabbing the sunglasses that laid on the table.

"Damn it's to early!" he yelled.

"What?" Came another yell from upstairs.

"Nothing" Matt yelled back up. "Hurry up in there!  
We've only got an hour!"

Hearing the water run again, Matt wondered if Jeff was re-dying his hair again. Lately Jeff seemed to dye it whenever he had the chance to. Matt had asked him once why he did it so often. The only reason Jeff would reply with is that it put him to ease.

An hour and a half later the two sat on an airplane headed to Pittsburgh, sitting in complete silence.

"Matt?" Jeff asked breaking the quiet.

"Yea bro?" came Matt's reply.

"We're going to a children's hospital right?" Jeff asked.

Matt sighed, each time they went to a hospital Jeff always had some type of problem. From the shakes to needing to use the restroom every five minutes, there was alway's something. Though anytime Matt would ask Jeff about it, Jeff would just shrug his shoulder's and walk away. He just hopped that maybe with Jeff asking him a million time's over was this time's problem.

"Yes Jeff, we're going to the hospital."

"Oh." Jeff replied and remained silent the rest of the trip, to Matt's surprise.

After the plane landed the two went to claim their luggage, being mobbed by the usual group of teenage women. All of them wanting something signed. Slowly but surely Matt and Jeff made it to the baggage claim, and then out to the limo which waited for them.

"This is WORTH the month off from that!" Matt gasped out.

"Yeah." Came Jeff's reply.

"Come on Jeff. Cheer up, were going to cheer these kid's up, the least you can do is look semi cheerful" Matt stated which got a small smile from Jeff. "That's better." Matt added with a laugh.

Five minute's later the guy's were at the front of the hospital, the Head Nurse Denise came out to greet them.

"Matt, Jeff! It's so great that you guy's decided to come." She said smiling at the two.

"It's our pleasure Miss." Jeff replied.

"Oh call me Denise." she said. "We've got them all together in the common room, now I know your schedule's are pretty busy, but if you could please just stay an hour. I'm sure the kid's would be more then pleased."

Denise then lead Matt and Jeff into the hospital, as they headed toward the room where the children were Jeff began to feel the familiar uneasy twitch in his stomach, without thinking he placed his hand over it. Catching Matt's attention.

"You all right Jeff?" He whispered to him.

"Yea." Was Jeff's reply.

"Now, I have to warn you. The kid's are big fan's of yours, so don't be surprised if you get the thousand and one treatment." She said with a small giggle.

"That's all right Denise. I think were just about used to it by now." Matt said laughing as well.

As they entered the room the boys got the thousand and one treatment to the first degree. Awnsering question's, signing this and that. Posing with this child or that child. Smiling here and there. Amazingly thing's began to die down after a half hour, some of the children had even went back to their room's. Only about eight were left surrounding Jeff and Matt.

"What's it like to be a pro wrestler?" One child with brown hair asked Matt.

"Well, being able to make people happy and enjoy themselves is always amazing." Matt said, pausing for a moment he looked over at Jeff who seemed to be watching someone himself. Following Jeff's gaze Matt caught sight of a young child who looked to be five year's old. Unlike the other children she stayed in the corner of the room coloring. Matt looked back at his brother, watching the odd smile come over his face. Then he watched as Jeff stood up and walked over to nurse Denise.

"Excuse me guy's." Matt said to the boy's he was talking to. He then got up and went over to the nurse and his brother. Catching the end of their conversation.

"She was brought here almost a year ago. Her parent's just dropped her on the check in desk and left. We checked her over and discovered that she had a brain tumor. Having less then two year's left to live. It's such a shame, she's such a sweet child." Denise said.

"What's her name?" Jeff asked.

"Alexis." Denise said. Jeff started to walk over to her, but Denise stopped him. "Jeff, be gentle with her, she's been through a lot. And rarely say's a word."

Jeff nodded never taking his eyes off of Alexis, he walked over to her and sat down next to her. She paid him no attention but continued to color. Smiling Jeff picked up another crayon and proceeded to color the page next to Alexis's, suddenly Alexis stopped coloring.

Matt and Denise kept their distance, when they saw her stop coloring Denise let out a small gasp.

Alexis looked at Jeff, her eye's seemed to be studying his face. With a smile of her own she turned her own page she was coloring so Jeff would be able to color one half and she could the other.

"Now isn't that something." Denise said to Matt.

"What do you mean?" Matt said looking at her.

"Well, Alex normally doesn't like male company. When one of the other boy children would come to play with her she would cry."

"Sound's like she's had it pretty bad."

"I think she has. She doesn't like to talk about it though." Denise said.

Matt and Denise continued to watch the pair, Alexis colored on. Once in a while she would offer her crayon to Jeff, who would take it and give her his.

"Look's like Jeff's made a new friend." Matt said to the nurse, who still stood dumbfounded at the sight before her. Smiling Matt left the nurse where she stood and went back to the boy's, leaving Jeff with Alexis.

"You have such a pretty name, Alexis." Jeff whispered to her while coloring.

"Nero." Alexis whispered back to Jeff's amazement.

"What did you say?" Jeff said stopping his coloring to look at the child.

"Nero." She replied simple enough and continued to color.

"That's what I thought you said." Jeff said smiling then went back to his own coloring. He remembered what the nurse had said about Alexis, about her not being able or wanting to talk. Yet here she was talking to him. Jeff was awestruck, he felt something inside his heart, knowing it had to be love for this little child.

An hour later Jeff was still coloring with Alexis, Matt to was still pretty busy with some of the boy's playing some kind of game. Both obvious to how much time that had actually passed.

"Ahem." Came an interrupting voice from the doorway, both Hardy's and the children looked up seeing Nurse Denise in the doorway. "I know you guy's are having fun, but I'm afraid visiting hour's are over."

A loud chorus of boo's were heard.

"Now children, thank Matt and Jeff for taking the time to come to visit you." She said sternly.

"Thank you Matt and Jeff." Came a chorus of voice's, Matt smiled at them until he caught site of his brother. He hadn't realized Jeff was still with that child. Jeff's head was down once again, and he appeared to be talking to Alexis. What he was saying though, Matt could not make out.

"Alexis, I have to go now. I really enjoyed this time we spent together." He said to the child, her head remaining focused on the paper, still she colored. Jeff began to get to his feet, feeling the slight pain in his muscle's from sitting in one position for a period of time. Frowning he looked down at Alexis, she had stopped coloring but her head remained down.  
"Good-bye Alexis." He whispered to her then turned to leave, following Matt to walk out the door.

"Nero!!" A voice screamed out behind him. Jeff turned to see Alexis standing up, with tear's streaming down her face. Kneeling down he opened his arm's out to her and she gratefully flew into them, flinging her arm's around his neck...clinging. Jeff stood up, turning to look at Matt and the nurse who had come running when she heard Alexis cry.

"Where's her room?" Jeff mouthed to the nurse.

"Follow me." She said back and started to walk down the hallway with Jeff following her.

"Jeff..wait." Matt said stopping his sentence when he seen the look on his baby brother's face. "All right.  
I'll be in the lobby."

Jeff smiled at his brother, then started to follow the nurse again with Alexis still in his arm's crying.

"Alexis we're going to your room, okay sweetie?" He whispered into her hear, only to receive a choked back "Nero" from her. Jeff felt his heart drop to his stomach, how could anyone hurt a child like this. Sighing he continued to walk to the child's room, once inside he sat on the bed, pulling the child into his arm's as though he was holding a baby. Alexis looked up at Jeff, her eye's wide with fear. Jeff quickly looked at the nurse, knowing that if she was there Alexis wouldn't speak to him.

"Could you leave us alone for a moment?" He asked her.

"Well..ah..I suppose so. But only for a few moment's" She replied hastily leaving the room closing the door behind her. Jeff turned his attention back to the child. "Alexis?"

"Nero." She whimpered softly, playing with a lock of his hair. Jeff looked down into her face, her hair was thinning due to the radiation, and her face..her face looked year's beyond what she really was. Inside the blue speck's of her eye's laid her pain. Jeff could feel the tear's raising to his eye's.

"Alexis..honey I really need to go..you need to get your rest." He said trying to calm her.

"Nero." She whispered again.

"You sure do like my middle name, don't you?" He asked smiling. Alexis nodded.

"Moore." She said more of a question then a statement.

"Where's Matt?" Jeff said looking into her eye's, seeing his awnser."He's in the waiting room, waiting for me so we can go home. Back to Cameron."

Alexis jumped from within his lap, falling onto the bed she curled into a fetal position and closed her eye's. Jeff placed his hand on her shoulder, and she instantly withdrew from it.

"I'm sorry Lexie..." Jeff whispered sadly. He stood and walked to the door, pausing to look back at her once more. She remained in her curled position, not chancing a look back. Jeff sighed again and left the room, he felt as though his heart was shattered in a million pieces. He had made an instant connection with the child, instantly falling in love with her. The pain of leaving now was intense, silently he walked down to the lobby where Matt sat waiting.

"Jeff! Jeff?" Matt said going to his side, sensing something was wrong.

"I left her." He said without emotion.

Matt shook his head, Jeff usually had problem's with hospital's but nothing as intense as this, he had never seen Jeff this heartbroken. And he had only been with this child for little under two hour's.

"Come on Jeff, let's go. Maybe we can catch an early flight home." Matt said pushing Jeff towards the door. Jeff went as he was pushed, in his mind million's of thought's ran through his head. Thought's of Alexis. On the way back to the hotel Jeff suddenly had an idea.

"I'm staying here." He blurted out.

"Whatcha mean bro?" Matt replied.

"We're off for a month. Right?"

"And?" Matt knew where Jeff was getting to, and he wasn't sure if he liked it.

"I want to stay here for the month. I think she need's me Matt. She really connected with me back there."


	2. Chapter 2

Matt looked at his brother, trying to take in his stubborn look, checking for any sign's of a second thought. Seeing nothing of the sort, Matt turned his attention back to the road and sighed catching Jeff's attention.

"Matt, I'm doing the right thing." Jeff said within his voice laid his heart. 

Matt slowly pulled the car to a stop seeing the light was red, and turned to the younger Hardy boy locking eye's with Jeff. In his eye's Matt seen the intensity and love Jeff had growing inside him for this small child. No longer worried, Matt grinned. "All right man, let's stay here." He said turning back to the road and beginning down the road once more.

"You don't have to stay." Jeff said surprised that Matt wanted to stay with him. "Go back and relax!"

"No, Jeff. I'm staying." Matt replied stubbornly.

Jeff remained quiet the rest of the way back to the hotel, he was still confused about Matt's wanting to stay behind, but what confused him even more was the fact he wanted to stay behind himself. Just that morning he was complaining about going to the hospital and now he wanted to stay here for a month. It was all for the little girl. For Lexie. He was connected with her, not sure how or why. Jeff just knew he had to be there for her.  
The rest of the night was thick with an odd silence, Matt had tried to make some small talk as they ate their dinner. Jeff remained off inside his own thought's, his mind on Lexie and her condition. Finally Matt just gave up and went to bed, Jeff followed shortly after.

In his dream's, Jeff dreamed that Lexie lived with Matt their father and himself. She wasn't sick, and lived a full life. Knowing what it feel's like to be loved and to love. It felt to real to him, as he could feel the warmth of her hand clasped firmly in his as they walked down the dirt trail behind his home. He could hear her laugh, soft musical tones filled the air with each sound she made. It was as real as real can be to him, the thought of it forced him to bolt straight up in his bed. Glancing at the clock, next to his bed, Jeff groaned. It was only 2:30 am. Pressing his back against the bed, he glanced up at the ceiling and then closed his eye's.

The morning came slowly for Jeff, since the first time he had woken up it seemed as though he got up each half hour after that. Tossing and turning just made the thing's worse, finally at 4:30 Jeff groaned loudly and got out of bed. A quick glance over at Matt's bed, he noticed Matt was still sound asleep. Grumbling to himself, Jeff grabbed some cloth's then walked into the bathroom, closing the door firmly behind him. Without a word, Jeff started the water and began to strip. With his mind still focused on Alexis, Jeff climbed into the shower. Neither caring or concerned of the water's temperature, he simply let the water beat down onto him.

Sighing he leans his forehead up against the wall, under the shower head. Jeff watched as the color's of his hair swirled around and around in the drain. They hypnotized him, beckoning him to see past the color's that held him and to the beauty that laid behind it. Grabbing the soap, he quickly lathered himself then rinsed off. A small grin swept his face as he began to wash his hair.

"I'm beginning to understand." Jeff thought. "Understand it all." Washing the soap out of his hair, Jeff turned the faucet's off then got out of the shower. After a quick towel dry, Jeff dressed then as quiet as he could, he left the hotel room. Walking in the hall's of the hotel, his mind worked overtime. If there was only something he could do for Alexis, something that could help ease her pain. Or even just to give her a few moment's of happiness. He had to do something, anything for that child. Twenty minute's after the shower, Jeff was back in the car on his way back to the hospital. His stomach no longer fluttered with the butterfly's he had when he first went. It was now warmed over by his heart, which claimed love for the child.

The closer he got to the hospital, the further the warmth spread. When Jeff pulled into the hospital's main parking lot, his whole body was tingling. With a grin stretching from one ear to the other, Jeff got out of his car and made his way into the hospital. Praying that they would give him some special time with Lexie, since visiting hour's were surely still quite far away.

"Can I help you?" The receptionist said as he neared the station.

"Ah, yes. I'm here to see a child named Alexis? My name's Jeff Hardy, I know I'm not on her visitation list, but I'm sure if you would only ask the nurse Denise she can explain thing's to you." Jeff replied hurriedly sounding a little more excited then he had wanted.

"Alexis.." The woman repeated looking down at her paper's. "Well, Mr. Hardy is it?"

Jeff nodded.

"I'm sorry, but you cannot visit with the child right now."

"Why? What's wrong?? Is she all right??? What happened?" Jeff demanded, his voice strong and deep yet full of concern. The woman behind the desk stood up and walked out from behind it until she stood right in front of Jeff.

"I'm sorry Mr. Hardy...Alexis was rushed into surgery early last night. We haven't heard any word on her, the doctor's are still working with her"  
Jeff felt his body begun to cave, his heart thumped. The tear's flooded down his face, Jeff sat in the chair behind him, dropping his face into his hand's...Jeffery Nero Hardy cried.

Minutes passed like hours as Jeff sat in the waiting room. No one would give him an update on Alexis, and he now feared the worst.  
"Excuse me?" He said to the receptionist. The woman turned toward Jeff. "Yes, Mr. Hardy?"

"Have you heard anything, anything at all yet?" Jeff asked of her, his eye's pleading for some answer. The woman looked deep into his eye's. before shaking her head.  
"I'm sorry Jeff." She said. "Nothing's come down. If anything does I'll be sure to alert you."

"Damnit!" Jeff exclaimed smashing his left fist onto the table, the force caused the receptionist to jump. "Why can't you people ever give straight answers! Where's Nurse Denise? I want to see her! At least she will be able to tell me what's going on here! Where the hell is she?"

Jeff's faced shown bright red, full of anger. His eye's ablaze with fear and anger. Frightened by his demeanor, the woman reached for the security button.  
"What's going on here?" A voice came from behind Jeff. "I'm about to call security. This gentleman has gotten way out of control for me." The receptionist stated.  
"Me? Out of Control? I just want to know what's going on with my daughter!" Jeff demanded once more, not aware of the word's he just spilled from his mouth.  
"Jeff." The voice behind him whispered. The person was now directly behind Jeff, with their hand on his, urging him to turn around. "Look at me, please."

Jeff turned, the fury in his eye's softened some as he caught the eye's of the new nurse.  
"Denise, what's going on?" He begged, his attitude quickly changing. "What happened"  
"Come with me Jeff." She replied taking him by the hand. She led him off into a smaller office, closing the door behind them. "Please, sit"  
Doing as he was asked, Jeff sat. Not once taking his eye's off of Denise. "Is she all right?"

Denise took her seat opposite of him.

"Last night Alexis's doctor walked into her room to find her not breathing, she had a considerable amount of blood coming out of her ear at the time. He quickly then rushed her up the the OR. Jeff they're doing all that they can." She said and then paused. "I'm sorry."

"No." Jeff replied sternly. "This couldn't be happening. It couldn't. Alexis has to be all right."

"Jeff, out there you said something about her being your daughter. She's not your daughter Jeff." Denise said.

"I..she..daughter." Jeff mumbled out loud. With tear's in his eye's he looked towards the door. "She has to make it."

"I'm sorry Jeff." Denise repeated, her own eye's full of concern for the young man.

"Your sorry? That's all you can say to me. Your Sorry?" Jeff yelled, his voice trembling as well as his body. "You said she had two year's!!!"

Denise looked at Jeff, the tear's beginning to form in her own eye's.

"Jeff, honey, please you have to understand when I said two year's. She's been here for a year and a half already. I'm sorry. But were doing the best we can."

Jeff stood his face twisted in anger, and walked over to the wall.

"Well, your best isn't good enough!" He screamed once more, then smashed both fist's into the wall leaving considerable dent's in the wall, and causing Denise to jump at the reaction. With a grunt he walked out of the room, heading down to where Alexis room was. If anything, he'd wait there for her.

Denise sat in the office, both confused and hurt from Jeff's outburst.

"How can he be so attached to this child." She said to herself trying to ponder the answer to it. "How."

Back in Alexis's room, Jeff sat and waited. His mind a jumbled mess and his heart seeking answers.

"She doesn't deserve this." He said to the empty room, then looked up at the ceiling. "Why?! Why do you always have to do this!"

Jeff buried his head into his hand's, wishing silently to send it all away.

In the office, Denise flipped through her contact list. She felt she should call Jeff's brother Matt, who hopefully may be able to settle Jeff down. She smiled when she finally came across the name of the hotel. Grateful to herself that she took the time to write it all down when Vince first contacted her about the Hardyz accepting the job. Quickly she dialed the number, getting a sleepy Matt answering.

"Hello." He drawled out.

"Matt? I'm sorry to wake you." She replied remembering how early it was. "We have a slight problem down here."

"Huh? Down where." Matt said, gradually awakening.

"At the hospital Matt." Denise responded.

"What's the problem?"

"Your brother."

Those two word's took what ever sleep he had in him away. Jeff. Glancing over at his brother's empty bed, Matt felt his stomach turn.

"Is he all right?" Matt asked her.

"Well, in term's no." She replied, then went into explaining what had just taken place. Matt listened amazed, his brother was never this emotional.

"All right." Matt said after she had told him everything. "I'm on my way down there now. Just don't let anyone near him until I get there, including Alexis."

"Fine." Denise sighed. "Please hurry."

"I will."

The two hung up then, Denise sat back in her chair and glanced at the two dent's in her wall. While minute's away Matt Hardy rushed around to get ready and leave. 


	3. Chapter 3

"What the hell is Jeff getting himself into?" Matt whispered into the empty car as he pulled into the hospital's parking lot. Twenty minute's prior he had been sleeping peacefully. And now, now here he was chasing after his brother who, from what it seems, had gone absolutely nuts.

"Sometimes I don't get you Jeff." Matt mumbled under his breath as he got out of his parked car and headed into the hospital. Easily finding his way to Denise's office.

"Come in." He heard her say after he knocked on the door. Gently he pushed the door open, his eye's falling instantly on the two dent's Jeff had made in the wall.

"He did those?" Matt asked not taking his eye's off of them.

"Yes, Matt." Denise replied. "I don't know what to do at this point. I knew security would be out of the question, so I called you."

Matt finally looked at her and nodded.

"I'm glad you called me." He replied. "Where is he now?"

"Follow me." Denise said getting up from behind the desk and making her way to the door. "He's in her room."

Making sure Matt was following her, she lead the way down the hallway.

"Please understand that I didn't want to hurt him." She said as they walked. "I only wanted him to know, to understand the circumstance's."

"I know." Matt replied.

Second's later they stood at the door to Alexis's room.

"Let me go in." Matt said putting his hand on the door.

"All right, I'll be back in ten minutes."

Nodding to her, Matt waited until she left before he opened the door and walked inside. Jeff's head emerged from his hand's when he heard the sound, surprise and confusion filled his eye's when he saw it was only Matt.

"What are you doing here?" Jeff asked his brother.

"That's just what I'd like to know." Matt replied looking at Jeff.

"You wouldn't understand." Jeff retorted.

"I wouldn't understand? Understand what?" Matt said flinging his arm's into the air. "I wouldn't understand why your acting like a complete nut!? What?! Tell me Jeff! Tell me what I wont understand!"

"You wont understand why I'm acting this way." Jeff mummers softly.

"Why Jeff, for God's sake WHY!"

"Mom." Jeff responded, instantly shutting his older brother's mouth. "I'm doing this for MOM DAMN YOU!"

Matt paused, this was all about their mother? Their mother had passed away many year's ago, after suffering with a long battle of cancer, and now Jeff...

"Geez.. wow.." Matt stammered, now beginning to see why Jeff was acting this was. "Jeff, I.. I'm sorry."

"No, your not." Jeff said confident and stood, his voice raising. "You think I'm nuts just like everyone else in this damn hospital."

Turning his back to Matt, Jeff walked over to the window and looked out. He watched as the day's breeze lifted the leave's and small piece's of litter, caring them off to an unknown destination. He heard Matt sigh, then walk over to him.

"You don't know what it's like Matt." Jeff said, still looking out the window. "I had to watch her. I had to watch her in pain and suffering ... and I couldn't do a damn thing about it!"

Matt remained silent, knowing his brother needed to let it all out finally. The pressure inside was to much for Jeff, he needed a release.

"I had to watch my mother lay there, lay there in pain. All those day's and month's, she was in nothing but pain." Jeff said. "She'd never tell me she was in any though, never. Any time I would ask, she'd say...

"It's okay sweetie, I'm fine"

"But she wasn't fine, was she Matt?" Jeff turned to look at his brother, the forbidden tear's of the built up emotional past finally breaking free from within the young man, now flowing down the side's of his face.

"Jeff..." Matt said rushing forward to take his brother in a huge hug. "I'm sorry man. If I would have known... you felt like this.. Jeff why didn't you tell me?"

Matt mummers those word's into his younger brother's multi colored hair. Jeff shoulder's shook with a response.

"Because it was me! I killed her!!" Jeff screamed pulling away from Matt, who stood shocked at Jeff's change in demeanor.

"Jeff..!"

"No, Matt. I killed my mother! I couldn't do anything. Nothing. NOTHING!" Jeff cried the tear's now blinding his sight, yet in his mind he thought he saw clearly. "I couldn't do anything to help, it's not that I didn't want to... I couldn't. All those wire's and tube's.. Matt it all scared me! I thought if I went near her I'd give her more pain..."

"I know Jeff." Matt said in a soft tone. "Baby boy this wasn't your fault. Mom just got sick, there was nothing either of us could have done to stop it. Nothing Jeffy."

"But.. but.."

"Jeff she knew how we felt about her, she knew we loved her."

"You think so?" Jeff asked him, his voice childlike.

"No, I know it." Matt said smiling back. "She was proud of you then...and would certainly be proud of you now, just as Dad and I are."

"Really?"

"Yes, Jeff, really." Matt replied hugging his brother once more.

"Matt." Jeff said into his ear. "I have to do something for Alexis... she's just a child."

"What do you want to do?" Matt replied as they broke the hug.

"I don't know, but I just can't abandon her like her own parent's did." Jeff said thoughtfully.

"What do you have in mind?" Matt asked his little brother. Eyeing him carefully, he tried to determine what Jeff was actually up to.

"I don't know Matt." Jeff mumbled as he walked over and slumped down into the chair next to the bed. "Something."

Silence drifted between the two brother's, Jeff sat picking nervously at his black nail polish which stained his fingernail's. Matt stayed close to the window, in his mind an admist of thought's, swirling around the Hardy family. Time drifted on..

"Matt?" Jeff asked, a half hour had come and went still not a word from the nurse or a doctor. "Something's wrong."

"Why do you think that?" Matt replied. The silence between the two now ended.

"They would have come in here and talked to us by now!" Jeff exclaimed getting to his feet and heading towards the door.

"Jeff. Jeff wait!" Matt called out to him, though he to was very concerned about the little girl. When the nurse didn't return, as she said she would, Matt's thought's began to take on lives of there own. A small sigh shot through his body as he followed Jeff's lead out the door.

"Jeff?" Matt said walking over to where Jeff was now standing.

After he left the room, Jeff headed directly to the nurse's station. Once more demanding answers to question's they couldn't answer.

Jeff whirled around at the sound of Matt's voice. "They don't or wont tell me anything Matt!"

Jeff's voice once again ridged with anger and pain. Picking up on it, Matt placed a steady hand on his shoulder.

"Maybe they don't Jeff." He said calmly to him, then turned towards the nurse. "Could you please get Nurse Denise down here?"

Jeff groaned at the mention of her name. "Not her."

"Jeff if anyone knows anything, it's a sure in that she does!" Matt said defending the woman, Jeff nodded in acceptance.

"I will." The nurse said. "As long as you promise to keep that one in line!"

Matt grinned and nodded, taking his little brother by the arm he guided him back into Alexis's room. A few moment's later, Denise joined them.

"How is she?" Jeff said getting to his feet the moment she walked into the room. Denise took a step back from Jeff, the two hole's in her wall still quite fresh in her mind. Sensing this Matt stepped between the two.

"How is she." Matt asked repeating Jeff's question.

"Not good." Denise spoke. "It's progressed faster then we had thought. The doctor's have done everything they could, I...she only has a few hour's..I'm sorry Jeff."

The last word's were spoken through a whisper, Jeff's heart plummeted at the news. Fresh tear's flowed freely down his face. Matt to, begun to cry.

"Can..ca..can I see her?" Jeff asked through the tear's.

"Yes,. Please follow me." Denise said turning to walk out of the room. Both Hardy boy's followed her, the walk seemed to drag on. Adding mile's to just one step.

Time stood still for the youngest Hardy boy, the walk down the mere hall had seem to last forever. Proving each step he had taken to become closer to the child was only to put twenty more in front of him. Now, however Jeff stood at the door giving entrance to her room. He had paused shortly behind Matt and the nurse, allowing them to enter the room letting the door close softly behind them.

Jeff Hardy was not ready. Not ready to face losing someone once more. Thoughts of the late Ms Hardy drifted into his mind.

His mother.

Matt's mother.

Gilberts wife.

She truly had been a strong woman, in both the body and soul. His mother had come to the reassurance and closure when her time had come. She had been to the point where she was no longer afraid of death, but welcomed it to ease the pain she felt. Knowing her boys would be well taking care of, and positive they would have a special, unique guardian angel.

But Alexis, she had no one. She was lost within the big world of confusion, only a child without a mother's embrace.

She would not understand the welcome death would bring upon her, the child would be alone, scared and afraid.

"I can't let her hurt alone!" Jeff cried within his head. His heart cried out for the young girl ached to give her the love she so truly deserved.

"Alexis." He whispered and then entered the room.

Jeff had been to hospitals before, he had come to be accustomed to the many patients it held inside. Somehow, however, the young child laying before him on the hospital bed??rightened him.

Alexis lay motionless on the bed; tubes and wires were placed throughout her body. Her eyelids had been taped shut; she looked to be at peace with herself.

A shudder gently rippled through the younger Hardys body, he gasped softly and continued on into the room. Taking in everything about it, gazing softly toward the heart monitor, watching as it carefully beeped steadily.

"Jeff?" Matt asked moving toward his younger brother. He had seen Jeff's face when he entered the room. He wondered if Jeff would be all right once he was inside.

"I'm okay." Jeff whispered moving to Alexis's bed. Taking one of her hands into his own gently, he softly stroked it with his other hand. Praying that a simple touch would bring life back into the sleeping beauty. "Can I have a few minutes?"

The words left his mouth like feathers in the wind. So light, one might be afraid a soft wind would lift them off into the bright blue sky.

Nodding, the nurse left the room. The woman didn't fully understand the closeness between the child and man, yet she respected the look that was held deep within his eyes each time he looked down at her. It was an unconditional love he held, something that isn't given??ut is instantly held deep within.

The older Hardy boy slumped his shoulder, concern reaching his brow.

"Are you sure?" He asked, the question simple enough still it found Jeff a loss for words. A slight nod of the head was to be Matt's answer. A gently sigh hit Matthew Hardy then, now wishing that he could have the power to cease his brothers pain??ven if it ment to give his life for the child to live.

"I'll be outside." Matt said squeezing Jeff's shoulder then leaving the room.

He watched her as Matt left the room, waiting for the soft click of the door closing behind him. Once alone in the room, Jeff closed his eyes and began to hum. When he and Matt were little children, their mother would sing them a soft lullaby before they drifted off to sleep. The lyric's, all but one verse, Jeff had long since forgotten, the musical tone and love behind it??hat was still there.

As he hummed, Jeff stroked the child's cheek gently and every so often brushed a stray strand of hair from her angel-like face.

"Lexie." Jeff said breaking the hum. "I know somewhere in there, your there, listening to everything that's going on around you."

Jeff's voice turned soft and gentle. "Honey you've had something taken from you many, many year's ago. Something I want so desperately to give back to you."

His voice trailed off as more tear's emerged from within his eyes.

"Dear God, please! Please don't take her from me!" He cried, clutching her small hand to his chest and closing his eyes. Jeff prayed then, praying now for a miracle.

"Nero?? A soft whisper broke into his prayer, causing his eyes to flutter open. In front of his stood Alexis, the bed and all of its hospital equipment gone from view. The Hardy boy now sat in a huge field, covered with multiple flowers of all kinds. The sky was a bright shade of blue with small patterns of clouds scattered throughout it.

"Where..am..I?" Jeff managed to say still sitting.

"Nero." She whispered again, a little louder this time.

"Alexis?" He asked, quickly the child nodded a response. "Lexie!"

Getting to his knees, Jeff pulled the child into an embrace then held her arm length. She looked radiant; her skin, which was once a pale white, now was a light tan. Her face and eye's that were once clouded with pain, were not lit full of joy. The fog vanished from the girl's eyes, reveling the impish grin children normally held within.

"How? Where am I? Where are we?" Jeff asked. Confused, he was full of questions.

"Come." She said softly holding out her hand to his. Getting to his feet, Jeff took her hand and allowed himself to be lead to the middle of the field.

"She wants to see you." Alexis whispered, sitting on the ground and motioning for Jeff to do the same.

"Who honey?" He asked her. Following his question a young woman walked out from within the tall grass, looking to be no more then twenty-one. She walked softly; keeping her eye's locked on Jeff Hardy's.

Jeff sat motionless; the woman walking to them was absolutely beautiful. She had long dark hair reaching about the middle of her back, her eye's shown with a mysterious twinkle of green. To Jeff Hardy, she was the perfect woman.

When the woman reached Alexis and Jeff, she held out her hand to the child who immediately stood.

"Who are you?" Jeff asked, getting to his own feet. The woman smiled at him; bringing her hand to his face she gently caressed his cheek.  
"My little Jeffie." A voice within his head whispered. "My darling."

"Momma?" He said out loud, his eye's widening.

The woman before him smiled and opened her arms to him, closing them around Jeff when he stepped into her embrace. He held on to her then, shedding the tear's that had been building up inside of him throughout the many year's.

"I'm so sorry Mom." He cried onto her shoulder. "I'm sorry you had to leave!"

"Shhh." She soothed. "I know baby, I didn't want to leave you, your brother and father either. But I had to, my time ended down there."

She pulled slightly away from him, still holding him within her arms.

"My time ended down there, Jeff, but it shall never end up here or here." She told him, touching his heart and then her own. "I'm always with you, always."

Tear's flowed from Jeff; a sudden lift was taken from his body. Leaving him whole once more.

"Alexis?" Jeff asked his mother, searching her eyes for hope.

"She must stay here with me." His mother replied, smiling down at the child. "She loves you a lot Jeff, and thanks you for loving her."

Jeff turned to the child, kneeling down to her level he pulled her into his arms.

"I love you Alexis." Jeff whispered into her ear.

"I love you to Nero." She replied back softly.

"It's time for us to leave and for you to go back Jeffie."

Jeff looked up at his mother, tear's still forming small trails down his cheeks.

"Will I see you again?" He asked her.

"In your dreams I shall always be there." She said smiling. "You are my baby boy, Jeff."

Jeff stood, smiling through his tears at the two before him.

"And you two??re my guardian angels."

"I love you Jeff." They whispered.

"I love you too?? Jeff began to say, but the field began to fade from view.

"Mom? Alexis? MOM!" Jeff screamed.

"Jeff?" He heard someone off in a distance whisper; the person repeated his name over and over, getting louder and louder doing so. Finally things began to come back in focus, finding himself back in the hospital.

"Jeff!" Someone yelled into his ear, the voice full of concern.

Jeff turned toward the direction the voice came from, catching Matt's face staring back at him.  
"Jeff?" Matt asked, his voice now lower yet still laced with concern.

"I'm okay, Matt." Jeff said looking around him. He was now back in the waiting room. "How did I get out here?"

"You were carried out." Matt said. "Denise and I were in the hallway when Alexis's heart monitor went off. When we got into the room, you were just sitting there looking at the wall. Jeff, what happened in there?"

"How's Alexis?"

"She died, Jeff." Matt said frowning. "I'm sorry."

"Okay." Jeff replied, glancing up towards the ceiling.

"Okay?" Matt remarked confused, he had expected Jeff to have fallen apart.

"She's okay now Matt." Jeff replied. "She's okay now."

Matt continued to look at Jeff, trying to understand the new change that had come over his younger brother.

Jeff closed his eyes; a smile touched his lip's. Alexis was now with his mother, he knew she would be well taken care of. Thoughts of his experience would lay forever deep within his heart, sometime later Jeff would tell Matt about what happened that one morning. That one morning he had gone to heaven. 


End file.
